Female moral policing

Having XX in your chromosomal set isn't always a blessing. At times, you get to be the centre of attention when you are the only girl among your siblings and the social century-old privilege that comes with being one such as being offered a seat and not being too hard on you simply because you are a girl. In spite of all that, as a girl myself, I think I would have much preferred being born as a male if not anything else but a female in this world that's gruesomely one sided. When a girl dresses a certain way or behaves in a certain manner, she gets chided for it, sometimes to an extent of being called a prostitute when she's probably not even seen a phallus before. I am not saying that if you have seen one (especially through unsolicited nude pics), you are considered one, but you get my point right? Even in downfall of marriages and relationship breakups, it is ALWAYS the female who is at fault despite clear evidence against it. A girl always has to watch where and when she goes out and who she is with and what she does but not one time do you see a guy being 'handled' that way. Is it because girls are physiologically weak and biologically preyed after or is it because they don't usually clap back at the threatening voices around them? Moreover, girls are always the object of scrutiny when it comes to attire even in this 21st century and don't even get me started about the common perception that girls are only fit to play the role as cooks and housekeepers while guys get to just pig out and make a mess. Curfews and word filters only apply to females and  some of our own kind are even berating those who go against it. If it's your own family who comes up with a set of rules, whether or not it is gender bias, then it probably wouldn't be right to argue about it but if some 3rd person tells you what to do or not do, I think it's time you shut them up and make it clear to them that their opinion, not a germ bit of it matters and that they should save it for their own family members and their ownselves. What seems right to you, may not be so for others and vise-versa, so stop getting overconfident that you are able to change people simply because you think you are above everyone else.

Spa update regarding tapisan

Guess there is some justification to being called a worry wart; woke up today and as usual I checked my spa online account application status for the house officer post and started freaking out when I saw the words 'tidak melepasi tapisan bla bla bla' on bil. 2 and 3 of the last semakan page. On bil. 1 it was just merely stated as ''melepasi syarat2 bla bla' instead of 'melepasi tapisan pada...' which I had been expecting all these while. Worst of all, I was all groggy and sluggish at that time (it was just 9am..what do you expect? 😅) and the 'tidak melepasi tapisan' appeared as 'tidak melepasi syarat' to me. Instantly I froze and ran my mind through the various possible errors I could have made during the application in July 2018. I mean did I just wait more than 6 months for this??!! I hardly finished my breakfast before I practically speed-dialled the spa number in order to confirm my doubts while praying that I was wrong. In these kinda things, I dread being told that I made a mistake because it would literally cost me my life. Fortunately, the spa officer answered my call after a few rings and after she told me that there was nothing wrong with my application and that it was supposed to be like that, that's when I finally heaved a thankful breath. Gosh. I think my possible cause of death someday is gonna be due to stress. Apparently, if you are waiting for your housemanship after applying on the spa website, you should know that roughly after more than 6 months, you will get the 'melepasi syarat2 etc' that I mentioned earlier and after some time, that status will change to 'melepasi tapisan..' and then finally to 'lantikan kontrak..' before you can finally get your hands on the e-ho system. No one told me this before and I had to find that out through an unpleasant cortisol raising experience. Being the doll that I am, I decided to share this with you so that you wouldn't go through what I went through and I sure as hell hope you would run into my blog. Cheers!

Visual versus plain alphabets

You may have noticed that my blog is devoid of images or fancy ads unlike those that you normally see on other wannabe blogs. The reason to that is simply because I am not a visual person (most of the time). Of course there are exceptions to that such as when I am out picking up things to buy or people to own 😅. Even as a medical student, I rather go through paragraphs after paragraphs of explanation than to brave through the tables or charts that were included although I know that they are there for a purpose (probably to summarize what has been lengthily written). Time and time again, I have had people who would preach about how effective studying using mind maps and tables can be and I don't exactly disagree with them but again being the non-visual persona that I am, I choose to do away with it. With class presentations however, that's a different story as everybody tries limiting the number of their power point slides in order to avoid out of the blue questions from the lecturers (especialy for those of you who just can't help plagiarizing) or having to keep going despite knowing that no one is listening to your extortionately long and dull presentation. I admit that even I subconsciously check the number of slides before deciding how long my attention span would be. In this world, nobody likes having to take the longer route unless it offers you something adventurous along the way.  My point here is that if you are as notorious as me when it comes to the way you say certain things either in writing or verbally, you will find that images or expressions aren't as necessary. Besides, Sidney Sheldon and Judy Blume sure as well know how to cook up a good story and they don't even need to worry about whether the cover for their novels is appealing or not because the content itself is attention-grabbing even from the first few pages so go figure!

Preps prior to housemanship

It has been more than 6 months since I submitted the SPA online application for the HO post and yes you guessed it right: I am still jobless and FOREVER waiting for my turn. Sob sob. Ain't nobody gonna shed a single tear of empathy for me so, moving on... what shall I write about today? Oh yeah..about the HO prep courses that are making headlines on social media these days particularly on Facebook. It is claimed by these so-called 'medical experts' that attending their 'value for money' courses gives the newbies the headstart that they apparently need in order to ace through their housemanship training period. Wow. Just wow.(note the cynical tone) Where do they come up with ideas like this? Not only is it highly profittable for the one who organizes it but it stands on its own because it happens that the current failure rate of housemen can easily be used as the supporting evidence to further harp on the importance of attending such training or coaching modules. I know of a fellow graduate who actually had clinical attachment done at several hospitals prior to her housemanship training and even she confessed to getting screwed all the same in the first week of her job. All the preparation in the world isn't going to save you from any of the toxicities that is expected of the training of junior doctors. Face it. That's just how it is. You could be a first ranker for all you might be or a highly dedicated lavishly spending course goer, but the reality would be just as sour for you as it is for others. Don't get me wrong; I am all up for getting prepared in advance on any way you can but why can't you trust yourself enough to do it on your own? The more support they get, the more easier it would be for them to turn something optional like this into something mandatory, thus further adding to the financial burden among the chronically unemployed grads..sort of like making observerships and/or externships  compulsory for the US residency training and they don't come cheap I tell you!!! Far from even affordable! I know I haven't been hitting the books as much as I used to when I was still preparing for the EPR but I have not neglected them either. I have been trying to coach myself before my intake which I think might be soon (hopefully!)..from recalling to adding up more knowledge on what one ought to know and to even tackling some calculations, I think I am doing myself more favor than any of those private courses could. After all, what's 5 years of medicine if you can't be your own tutor? 😇 It's up to you if you decide to go for those refresher courses because it is your money and your willingness but this is just something that I have an opinion about and hence have stated it here. If you think you would like me to start discussing (for free obviously, duh) about some of the medical stuff I have fed my mind with, let me know. 'When you share the knowledge you have with others, it helps you to gain more understanding of it'.